Third Campaign Challenge

Last day for the third campaign challenge.

Write a blog post in 300 words or less, excluding the title. The post can be in any format, whether flash fiction, non-fiction, humorous blog musings, poem, etc. The blog post should show:

that it’s morning,

that a man or a woman (or both) is at the beach

that the MC (main character) is bored

that something stinks behind where he/she is sitting

that something surprising happens.

Just for fun, see if you can involve all five senses AND include these random words: “synbatec,” “wastopaneer,” and “tacise.” (NB. these words are completely made up and are not intended to have any meaning other than the one you give them).

Here are some tips on “Show Not Tell” to help you out:

stay in the moment (describe what is happening to your character as it is happening to avoid telling)
avoid summarizing as much as possible (eg, “He stabbed her with a knife”). It can work well as a means of “skating over” unimportant details, or moving from one scene to another, but summarizing in the middle of a scene usually reads as “telling”
keep an eye out for words that (often) indicate the presence of “telling”. Examples include “was” (or other forms of “to be”) and “felt” (eg, “He felt scared” or “He was scared”). Though note that not every use of “was” is telling
try to avoid labelling feelings. Rather than saying, “I felt angry,” describe what those emotions are doing to the characters, mentally and physically
but don’t just describe the physical effects of an emotion (eg “I clenched my fists”). Dig deeper. Utilize the five senses, things the character notices or doesn’t notice, and memories of past events, as well as physical reactions, to show how the character is feeling.

Matt dug his toe into the cool sand, staring out at the sea. The white caped waves were rough from the storm that had just passed through. He closed his eyes as the wind ruffled his hair, cooling the sweat that had been sitting on his skin. Closing his eyes also shielded them from the blinding light of the sun as it crested over the horizon through the darkened clouds. It was too early to feel the warmth on his skin.
He sighed and flopped down on the towel. It was only twenty minutes but that was long enough. His toes continue to burrow down into the sand. He checked the synbatec reading on his wrist. His arm fell down and fingers drummed on his stomach. He would give it another twenty minutes before he was gone. Matt was never an early riser anyway. He wanted to go back to bed.
But it was all about the readings. Everything was about the readings that he didn’t even understand what half of them meant.
His nose wrinkled and he sniffed. His head lifted up and he looked around. He made a face and coughed, putting a hand over his nose as he got up. He glanced around as he got up, trying to track where it was coming from. He did the old fashioned sniff test and followed it to a patch of seaweed that must have come in on the storm waves.
He turned to go back to his spot when there was a glimmer as a stray ray of sun hit whatever was mixed in with it. He pulled the slimy strands away and then leapt back, letting out a started cry. The white bones were bleached and wrapped up in the seaweed, clutching a silver necklace in hand.

(I’m number 119.)

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14 Responses to “Third Campaign Challenge”

  1. Very interesting! Def mad me want to turn the page! Good job! ; )

  2. Nice work illustrating the boredom. I particularly liked the first paragraph. Nice use of the senses.

  3. That’s not exactly something you want to find on the beach. Excellent environment you established with such few words. Great job! πŸ™‚

  4. I loved your descriptive first paragraph.
    I also liked the ending — the detail of the silver necklace is intriguing. I want to know what happens next!
    Mine is #25.

  5. This challenge has been littered with the bones of the deceased! nicely done. mine is #56

  6. Wow very interesting premise! Great entry for the challenge πŸ™‚

    I’m entry #5

  7. I’m a judge in the third campaigners challenge and you have moved into the second phase of judging! Big congrats!!!

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